A Weekend Filled With Crap

Catchy title huh? Too bad it's true . . . literally.

I'm not sure what is going on with my son these days. Yesterday was a beautiful warm day and Kadin's neighbor friends came over and wanted him to play outside. So before I loaded him into his snow gear I specifically asked him if he needed to use the bathroom first . . . of course I got the "No Mom!" and he was out the door.

A little while later a tearful Kadin came to the door and said his famous catch phrase that he always says when he has done something wrong and knows he's going to be in trouble . . . "You're not going to like this" he says. Come to find out that he went potty in his pants . . . poop. Poop was literally smeared all over his underwear and bottom . . . Brian got him cleaned up and he headed back outside while I threw the poopy pants in the wash.

Today - we were literally headed out the door to go grocery shopping and Kadin suddenly disappeared. Brian found our son in the bathroom . . . surrounded by piles of poop on the floor. Yes, piles of poop.

I cannot even begin to describe the level of grossness I found in this bathroom. It was like the scene out of a horror show . . . there was poop on the floor, poop smeared all over his legs, butt and penis, poop on his pants and underwear and the smell that was coming from that room was like the decomposition of a dead body.

I am a mom. I have cleaned up poopy pants and diapers . . . cleaned up puke with all sorts of food in it . . . cleaned up diarrhea . . . had a juicy fart spray in my face . . . I am no stranger to disgusting things.

However, there was something about picking up five-year old sized warm turds off of my bathroom floor that just sent me over the edge. I was a mess . . . I gagged, almost threw up . . . all the while breathing through my mouth because I was certain if one tiny sniff of that poop entered my nostrils my breakfast would be added to the smoldering piles of poop still lingering on the floor.

If Bella and Brian weren't sitting in their coats waiting for me to clean up this mess I think I would've just thrown Kadin in the bathtub . . . BUT instead I went through half a roll of toilet paper, a whole container of wet wipes and 15 disinfecting wipes to scrub down the floor. I must have flushed the toilet 10 times and I felt like I needed to dip my hands in bleach when I was done.

Kadin, of course, was not nearly as traumatized. Once he had his clean underwear and pants on he hopped down the hallway like nothing had happened. What the . . . you just crapped all over the floor!!!!

Let's hope this is not a phase . . . and I'm considering installing a camera in our bathroom because if this ever happens again . . . I need to seriously know how in the world it occurs . . .